Oh Amazon Friday Sale, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love your wacky insistence on not offering free Super Saver Shipping on this deeply discounted gazebo, opting instead to add a shipping charge of one penny for it.
I love how you make it affordable for anyone to buy enough lighting to turn their lawn into a burlesque stage, if they wanted to.
I love how you taught me that there’s something called monkey king tea. Because, of course.
I love your many, many sharp knives for such low prices, because everyone feels better with a gigantic block of knives sitting on the counter. Well, I do, anyway.
I love your futuristic fan/ionizer combo, suitable both for home and the deck of the starship Enterprise.
I love how you take overpriced designer baby items like this diaper bag and make them affordable.
And I love how you can make me want a martini or eight even before breakfast.
Oh Friday Sale, don’t ever change.