Want Not

Okay, so, the Meijer Big Steal changes each day at noon (Eastern time), but I realized I’d forgotten to check it yesterday and just clicked over.

Yesterday’s deal (good for another 90 minutes or so) is on a Murphy bed for your under-25-pound pet. For real. For the unfamiliar, click through to look at it, but a Murphy bed is one of those things that can fold down from the wall and fold up to “hide” and save space. In this case, of course, the pet Murphy bed has its own cabinet. With an “espresso finish.”

Really, Meijer? This on-sale-for-$44-pet-bed “folds out when your cat or pup is ready for a snooze, and back up again when they are ready to seize the day”? Have you ever owned a pet? Because my dog doesn’t exactly 1) adhere to a regular schedule or 2) announced when she’s ready for a nap. Nor do I have such an empty life that I’d like to have to open and close her bed for her.

But this did add some levity to my day. (Bonus: if you click through to the product pictures, you can see a very confused-looking dog with a terrible haircut sitting on said bed with a distinct, “Seriously?!?” expression on his face.)

Sorry for being largely absent today; sometimes real life has to take precedence (pesky real life). You know I’d rather be here with you, right?

So, um, Amazon has this Plush Mr. Bill Dog Toy available for $6 shipped with Prime (look in the right-hand “more buying choices” column for the deal).

Is $6 the best price ever for a dog toy? Probably not.

Am I going to buy one for Licorice for Christmas, anyway, because it shrieks, “Ohhhhhh nooooo!” when squeezed? You betcha.

So it’s possible that I’m, uh, shopping for my dog. Stop laughing. I mean, Christmas is coming, and Santa always brings a few things for the dog’s stocking (yes, the dog has a stocking, hush), and I just thought I’d do a little bit of browsing around.

Which brought me to this platypus. At first I was all, Great, she loves stuffed toys, and a platypus is kind of amusing, so that’s fine. But. But. Apparently this thing is… filled with squeaky eggs? Which the dog is supposed to extract from an elastic opening “on the bottom”…?

I feel dirty.

And yet, I’d be lying if I told you I didn’t have one in my cart.